Self-forgiveness is a learned skill, Heather. Forgive and forget is bullsh*t.
Betrayal seems to have its own combination to the brain's memory vault, and I wish I had a delete button to clear some memories.
Over many years, I learned that rather than just shift my mindset away from all that crap (failing, betrayal, loss), I had to acknowledge and notice those emotions in a different way.
It was like shaking hands with all that mind chatter and finding another perspective.
It's interesting that for me the self-forgiveness process is similar to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's 5 stages of grief.
I think we would all love that delete button to clear memories.
Like you I have learnt that running away or trying to not think or dwell on the emotional hurt doesn’t work. You’ve got to face it, explore it and then allow yourself to move on from it.
Self-forgiveness is a learned skill, Heather. Forgive and forget is bullsh*t.
Betrayal seems to have its own combination to the brain's memory vault, and I wish I had a delete button to clear some memories.
Over many years, I learned that rather than just shift my mindset away from all that crap (failing, betrayal, loss), I had to acknowledge and notice those emotions in a different way.
It was like shaking hands with all that mind chatter and finding another perspective.
It's interesting that for me the self-forgiveness process is similar to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's 5 stages of grief.
I'm checking out the 8 steps book you mentioned.
Thanks for adding the book section at the end.
Thanks for such an informed comment.
I think we would all love that delete button to clear memories.
Like you I have learnt that running away or trying to not think or dwell on the emotional hurt doesn’t work. You’ve got to face it, explore it and then allow yourself to move on from it.
Stiffling those emotions drives them deeper in our subconscious and is one of the primary causes of post trauma stress disorder.
I experienceed PTSD from the sidelines. My husband's fifty-year anniversary serving in Vietnam triggered his.
It's sad he and many US Veterans refuse to process it.